Potty training is a journey into the unknown, for you and your child. While potty training, you will find yourself trying to be a good teacher by: motivating, encouraging, and making this natural experience fun. Don’t get me wrong, potty training isn’t fun, but you have to pretend it is, for your child’s sake. Even though potty training isn’t as fun as eating ice cream or jumping into a pit of foam, it can be quite hilarious. There have been many of times where I have had to hold back my laughter while I (gently) correct my son on where his pee and poop goes. He has taken a liking to going into the closet, closing the door, and peeing…on the floor. I have had more pee on me while potty training than I ever did when he was a newborn. And nothing I mean, NOTHING is funnier than a naked baby running around the house laughing their little butts off.
Here are the top ten things I have found myself saying to my son, over and over again, since we started our potty exploration.
- Pee goes in the potty, not on mommy’s leg. But seriously, we have been reading books (on many occasions) RIGHT NEXT TO THE POTTY and all of a sudden I feel pee sliding down my leg.
- You can’t flush until you get off the potty. He also tries to flush the toilet while I am still sitting on the toilet.
- Stop touching your pee while you are going potty. I can only assume this is normal, but really kid, stop touching your pee.
- Get your hands out of your butt. I know, it is really exciting to have open access to down there, but that doesn’t mean you have to sit around scratching it whenever you feel like it.
- Do not throw the dog’s carrot treat into your potty. I have already had to tell the dog that the potty wasn’t a new water bowl.
- Stop playing with yourself on the potty. It is impossible to pee and play with yourself at the same time. Or at least, I think it is, I am not a boy.
- Dogs pee outside, big boys pee in their potty. I just feel like referring to the dog as our son’s brother has confused him during this whole potty training adventure.
- You have to stop sitting on your potty to read and go to bed. I love that my son loves to read. And I love the fact that telling him I will read him a specific book will get him to at least go into the bathroom. With that being said, we are not going to read five books on the potty, then five more in the bedroom before bed, you sneaky little child.
- It is okay to make noises while you poop. We have only had two poops on the potty so far. One of which I grunted (with him) while reading Are You My Mother? I seriously can’t make this stuff up. The things we do for our children. FYI that poop was huge and I was one proud mom.
- You can’t get completely naked every time you have to go to the bathroom. I think I have one of those kids that believe the only way you can go to the bathroom is to be naked. Oh, public restrooms, you are the new devil.
And the fun has only just begun!